PRE-nursery?
What do the kids learn there, statistics, quantum physics?
I still chuckle to myself even after getting a good number of these reactions of disbelief and mild amusement from people, when I tell them that my boy is now in pre-nursery.
Usually, they think I’m that kiasu Singaporean parent who is eager to get my child ahead of the pack. And I don’t blame them, how does sending my 16 month old to pre-nursery sound like anything other than a draconian mother who sends her child for endless enrichment classes and who considers leisure activities to be piano and drama lessons.
So John has been attending his pre-nursery sessions at cherrybrook kindergarten for a month now. We both love being there, even though I come home completely sapped of my energy and John comes home covered in nasty germs – a necessary evil, we keep telling ourselves.
But no, John is not learning about statistics, or quantum physics. He isn’t even learning the ABC’s or 123′s. Instead, he’s working on his fine and gross motor skills and more importantly, learning how to interact with others in a kind and respectful way.
Sometimes you encounter some really horrid children and you can’t help but wonder what happened along the way as they were growing up and what went wrong. Sadly, in Singapore, kids aren’t taught to think about others as much as they should. John has to figure out how the world works around him, and how he fits in the world. When John throws a toy, we say, “Oops! Is Herbie alright? Look he got damaged, can you show mommy how to be gentle with Herbie?”
When he hordes his toys and doesn’t share, we say, “Can you put this toy back before you choose your next one? Other kids may also want to play with this toy.” Empathy is not the only thing he leaves with. Apart from teaching him to think about others, it also helps him with his attention span. He will be less easily distracted when he has to choose to focus on one toy at a time, instead of having many toys together at one go. And that’s a great gift to give any child who has 15 years of studying ahead of him, the ability to focus and pay attention.
When he is too eager to feed the fish or to have his turn at the activity gym, we say, “Let’s queue up here and wait out turn. We wouldn’t want other kids to interrupt us when we are having our turn, would we?”. He doesn’t just learn about queueing and order, he learns that life is not about “Me first”, and most certainly not just about ‘Me’. The world doesn’t revolve around them, and it’s possible to teach them that even at this young age. It’s hard work but I tell myself it’s an investment for the future.
We love sharing how my boy helps me with the laundry at home. He takes it upon himself to return all the laundry baskets to their respective rooms after I’m done loading the washer. The baskets are 2/3 his height but he uses all his concentration and determination to return them to the right rooms. When we return home, he knows that he needs to bring his dirty clothes to the room to his little laundry basket. And it’s so cute watching him toddle to the bedroom with his dirty clothes in hand, and running out excitedly after he’s done because he knows he did something good. (My future daughter-in-law will be very happy that he doesn’t leave his dirty socks or underwear lying around the apartment!). we wanted him to learn that he has to clean up after himself and he doesn’t get to go through life with everyone doing everything for him. And we also wanted him to learn that housework is not woman’s work, everyone in the family plays a part keeping the household clean and tidy.
I get to do a lot of learning at Cherrybrook too. The teachers, or directresses as they are called, are the ones who taught me how to respond when John throws a toy, or tries to keep all the toys to himself. And then it’s my turn to internalize what I was taught and apply it to all types of different scenarios. It’s so much easier if I just do the cleaning up and household chores myself, it requires less time and less patience from me. But it’s an investment for the future (I say that to myself – a lot). When he falls down and bursts out crying, it takes all my effort not to run over and pick him up. But he quickly realizes that it’s okay to fall down, and he just needs to pick himself up and mommy will be there to give him a big hug. It’s a challenge for me as it is for him, but I have no excuse not to work hard when I see my little 16 month old trying his hardest.
The hubby and I were both late bloomers, he didn’t take the first 12 years of his education seriously and I was always in the second last class and the bane of my teachers’ existence. But we think we both turned out pretty alright. We both learned eventually that life is not a race or about reaching a destination. Right now, for John’s sake, we will work on shaping him to become a child who respects himself and others. A child who knows God and strives to be more Christ-like in his thoughts and actions everyday. It sounds so difficult and daunting just from saying it out aloud, working towards it is even harder we’re sure. But fortunately for us, God has always helped us when we give our best.
Now, to make sure we give our best.
